Mourning

I can't cry enough
For everything important I've lost
The sobs can't come any faster
The pain like a white hot piercing light severing my already broken heart
I'm a girl of no resolve
I can't be consoled or managed or cajoled
I'm spiralling in a world of hurt that can't be stopped
The world screaming to suck it up and look forward
How can I see when I've been moved 2 steps backward
I grieve for my time lost
Like a dead friend I'm constantly reminded of it's absence
And yet I'm given no time to grieve
It creeps into my thoughts and settles in my dreams
Makes me want to drift and never awaken
Am strong enough to make it ?
My soul is cloaked in darkness
My vision tunnel, I'm fighting hard but nothing can change my fate
I'm locked in despair
Can I really start again from here?