Finally

It's a couple of hours till midnight
A little while before I take a step into the next year of my life
Like everyone else I lay on my bed taking stock of the last 12 months
It's been unjust and cruel, riddled with anxiety and grief of loss
And even though its seemed like the pain will never ebb and tears never dry
I'm here I made it till the end, I survived
A little darker, a little more cynical
A little less happy but still alive
When I close my eyes I see the motion pictures dance across my eyelids
My own memories a plague, a means to torture me
How sorry I am to all the faultless casualties
The regrets are piled up on each side of my heart
Snuffing out any hope except to keep living till I breathe my last
I've learnt alot of lessons, some necessary some not
Like life never goes as planned and even the good die young
And now my soul is riddled with scars
I hate what my life has become
With an intense passion that leaves me empty and aching
With only one thought floating reminding me to just breathe
To close my eyes when it gets too much and not see
And loose myself in the infinite possibilities of my dreams
So tonight I'll sweep up the pieces my tears the strongest glue
Going forward with no attempt at creating resolutions
But enduring my life and my present situation
So when the clock strikes 12 no spell is casted or broken
It's just me and 12 more months to remember to breathe