Betrayed

"We're together" she said her eyes tired her voice weak
I watched as she stared at her hands,  fidgeting in her seat
Couldn't believe what I heard
Can't wrap my head around the things she said
I stood up walking away fast
My heart beating wildly and uncontrollably hard
The tears threatening to spill
The voices trying to get the best of me
After 10 long years she crossed the line
Broke the rules and took what used to be mine
I don't know what I'm feeling
Head pounding, chest thumping, mind reeling
The inability for him to make up his mind
Put me in a position of being left behind
The everlasting hope centered on him
Now futile, unfulfilled and grim
I'm stuck in the middle, forced to be the umpire
Meant to be the judge and jury, while my rage burns lie fire
My heart hurts, my vision blurs, feeling betrayed
Wondering what would have happened if I stayed
Startled, I stare up hearing her cries behind the door
Ignoring her pleas for me to understand, I rock back and forth
Don't get me wrong, I'm not bitter they are together
But why did I have to be the pit stop before he went ahead to meet her
Feeling used, hurt beyond words doesn't even matter
They're lost in their own world of happiness and gleeful chatter
Rubbing my eyes I sigh, everything is going to be fine I lie
But I know the truth and I'm painfully aware
That no matter what I say or do
He's still intent on loving you
So I pull my self back up and smile
Pretend to be happy and try not to cry
For all the years spent, I have to try
Put my feelings behind a mask and lie